Iesus Non Amat Me

The heavy rain of the past two nights mocked my feeble attempts to patch up the conservatory roof and water is still getting in. I suppose I can console myself with the fact that it is significantly less water than it would have been had I not done anything, but I'm still disappointed. I see that rain isn't forecast for the next few days, so I might have to venture up the ladder once more when everything has dried out and try again.

I made more progress decluttering. I managed to throw away things that I'd been holding on to for ages for sentimental reasons by asking myself if I'd bother to bring them with me if I moved house. The answer was no, so why am I keeping them in this house? I did keep a picture of Dad from a work event though. I should probably throw it cos I have no idea who the men with him are, but now that he's gone I'm constantly aware that there are a finite number of pictures of him in existence.

In more uplifting news, I got a Switch. A free Switch, as I like to tell everyone, cos I had enough Nectar points to cover the cost. I've been collecting points for many years now and they were building up so high I thought I should probably use them. I really liked the idea of spending them on something specific (and fun) rather than just putting them towards normal shopping, and thus, free Switch! Now I just need to find the time to play it. My friend gave me Breath of the Wild as a belated birthday present and I'm enjoying it so far but I've only played it once!

I did find time to watch the most recent episodes of Lower Decks, which I am still absolutely loving. Especially the latest episode with all the simulations, which was pretty much one giant basket of Easter eggs (although do they still count as Easter eggs when they're so overt?) I've also now started Ted Lasso, which is great. I did not expect Rebecca to be so mean though! Clearly all those gifs and posts on Tumblr misled me.

And apparently certificates and pin badges are the in thing right about now cos hot on the heels of the ones I got for blood doning I've now received ones from Mensa for being a member for 20 years. Which is funny, cos it'll actually be 25 years in December so this must be a new thing they've suddenly introduced. Probably as a way to keep people from leaving.

Yes, this is another post about decluttering. Probably of interest to absolutely no one but myself but this is my journal and I want to keep writing about it so I can see what progress I'm making and keep myself accountable. Otherwise I feel like I could easily slide back into not bothering any more. Clutter blindness is a real problem!

I tried selling some books on Ziffit but it was just too much hassle, especially when they didn't want about 80% of them, so I found a book donation point instead. I took four boxes of books there the other day, which was good. I like it too cos it says that anything they can't sell they recycle, so I don't have to worry about the condition of the books either. I did end up keeping more than I probably should have, which felt like a bit of a failure, but I have such fond memories of reading those Horrible Histories books that I didn't feel I could get rid of them.

I've also cleared out some stuff from under my bed, including a basket of stuff that must have been there for years. I feel pleased about that, but of course it doesn't look like much of an accomplishment cos this stuff was all hidden away anyway. I suppose I could use this newfound space for other things that I want to keep, but then I run into the danger of forgetting about them too. Maybe it would be a good place for schoolwork.

Schoolwork is something that has been giving me a lot of problems when it comes to decluttering. I found it easy to throw away my old college work cos I was depressed and struggling for pretty much my whole time at sixth form so I had absolutely no interest in looking back at anything that reminded me of those days. But schoolwork is a different matter and brings back different memories. Part of me thinks I should just get rid of it cos it's completely useless and just taking up space, but it's also irreplaceable. I've managed to make myself get rid of a lot of things that I don't really need by reminding myself that I can always just buy it again if it turns out that I made a mistake, but that's not the case here. Once that schoolwork is gone then it's gone forever. So I'm finding this quite difficult.

I took more clothes to the donation bin, although again not as many as I would have liked, but it's another step in the right direction. And I've bagged up quite a lot of small electricals to take next time.

I also gave my shower head and grouting a proper clean. That's not really related to decluttering but I still consider it an accomplishment. And now my bathroom smells of vinegar.

Happy Year of the Ox everyone! It's my mum's year! We were talking about the Chinese zodiac at work on Friday and I discovered that my colleague is a pig like me so I looked up what characteristic we're supposed to have. Apparently I seek out social situations whenever possible and will stay up all night cleaning a messy room cos I'm so organised. You know, I'm getting the feeling that it's almost like astrology might not be entirely accurate...

Speaking of organisation (or lack thereof), I am continuing on with my decluttering mission. At the moment I'm trying to empty out cupboards and drawers of stuff that's been sitting in them untouched for literally decades. Then I'll have space to put away the things I actually use that have been cluttering up other areas of the house. I am slightly worried that by putting the new things away I'm condemning them to the same fate of being forgotten for years though. I have a real problem with object permanence and once something is put away I often forget it exists. So my plan is to try and put absolutely everything away so I have to go and get things when I need them. My hope is that, by doing this, I'll keep the items and their locations alive in my mind and will be much more efficient with my use of space and storage. Of course once this is done I'm going to have to keep on top of it and be careful not to leave things out cos I know myself, I'll just end up using those things again and again and forget everything else.

Having said all this, I'm almost doing the opposite with some items. Often when I get given something as a present or bring it back from holiday I'll think it's too nice to use and should be saved for a special occasion, so I'll put it away to keep it safe. But that's stupid cos then I end up forgetting about them and never using them and they goes to waste. I don't want to re-clutter the place with these things, but I do want to put them in locations where they I know where they are so they can be seen and used, rather than shoved in a box at the back of a cupboard doing nothing.

I have far too many cupboards full of stuff that's doing nothing.

One area I'm really struggling with is my clothes. The logical part of my brain says I should just clear out my wardrobe of all those goth-y clothes I haven't worn in ten years and probably never will again, but they're just so pretty. I also have other things that I haven't worn in so long but every time I go to get rid of them I start thinking that I might want them in the future. I have finally made myself throw away things from my childhood that would obviously never fit me again but I kept cos of pointless sentimentality, so that's progress at least.

Other examples of progress include getting rid of boxes that I've held onto for years for no good reason and throwing away my soap collection. When I was a kid I collected different shaped soaps and I kept feeling like I couldn't get rid of them cos they'd been so important to me in the past. But they were just old soaps covered in dust taking up space that I could use for other things, so in the bin they went. (I did consider using them as actual soaps so they'd at least be useful, but they were really old.)