READ ME

[crystalcazzie]

Hello friends, acquaintances and people who are lost on the way to someone else's journal. This is going to be a very nonsensical entry filled with pointless complaining and CAPSLOCK OF RAGE and also CAPSLOCK OF RANDOM EMPHASIS and quite possibly CAPSLOCK OF MAKING SENTENCES SOUND BETTER BY HAVING THREE EXAMPLES INSTEAD OF TWO.

First I must share with you all the fact that I am LE TIRED. This is because I began work at 9 today and, other than my hour's lunch (MMM SUBWAY GOODNESS) I didn't stop until 5:30. "But crystalcazzie" I hear you say, "Most people work from 9 till 5:30." And this is true, but unlike a lot of those people, my job involves walking almost constantly and carrying stuff. Often heavy stuff. Thanks to my job I now consider anything under 20kg to be LIGHT.

So my LEGS HURT. And my FEET HURT. And I have loads of bruises because I am apparently as clumsy as Bella Swan and keep walking into things. Heavy things. Sometimes metal things. I also have a plaster on my finger cos last night I managed to grate a chunk of it off. There was BLOOD. On the one hand this shows that the 99p Argos grater I bought for 89p is very SHARP and that is GOOD. On the other hand it shows that I should not cook for myself because I can't be trusted around sharp implements and, again, that I am like BELLA FUCKING SWAN. This is NOT A GOOD THING.

Also, I'm NOT DRUNK. I'm NOT EVEN DRINKING. This must be rectified immediately because it is FRIDAY and I'm on the verge of KILLING SOMEONE.

...

You can probably guess that that is supposed to represent me getting a drink. I now have RUM AND COKE. Actually I have RUM AND PEPSI but that doesn't sound as sophisticated. This means I have been PLACATED and my icon is no longer representative of my general mood, but I shall keep it anyway because Xena is AWESOME.

There was less CAPSLOCK OF RAGE in this entry than I had originally planned, because I am paranoid over the TINY TINY TINY CHANCE that someone from work will find this journal. It's more FUN without the RAGE anyway.

Comments

[zero-bug.livejournal.com]

I enjoyed this entry VERY MUCH. I hope your LEGS and FEET are feeling better. *rubs*

I am going to go grab a nice cold KEITHS from the REFRIGERATOR.

CHEERS. :D

[crystalcazzie.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you LIKED IT. I think I should do MORE entries like THIS. It was FUN.

Also, KEITHS is GOOD, can you PASS me one? I'm sure your ARM can REACH. =D

[tyasante.livejournal.com]

I am also filled with RAGE, of the Job Searchy Kind. I also FAILED to get DRUNK this weekend.

You should CEASE AND DESIST the mentions of BELLA FUCKING SWAN with connection to yourself. FOR SHE IS LE BITCH. ACTUALLY her WRITER IS LE BITCH AND SHE SICKENS ME.

I WANT IT TO BE TIME FOR HOLIDAYS. PREFERABLE HOLIDAYS FOR ALL. WHY ISN'T IT CHRISTMAS TIME YET?!

[crystalcazzie.livejournal.com]

That SUCKS.

I'm sorry, I shall STOP with the BELLA FUCKING SWAN references. Although I was on the OFFICIAL Twilight website reading bits she CUT OUT and they're EVEN WORSE than the books. I didn't know that was POSSIBLE.

CHRISTMAS IN JULY! IT SHOULD HAPPEN, LET'S DECLARE IT!